"If you know someone who has lost a child or anybody who's important to them, and you're afraid to mention them because you think you might make them sad by reminding them that they died, they didn't forget they died. You're not reminding them. What you're reminding them of is that you remembered that they lived, and that's a great, great gift" - Elizabeth Edwards

"The deep hurt is the mirror image of the deep joy that still awaits you." - Bruce C. Hafen

Contact me

Please feel free to email me at beatricemerrill@gmail.com

2 Responses to “Contact me”

  • Wendy Whiddon:

    I recently ran across your blog as I was searching the internet about Potter’s Syndrome. My baby sister just found out this week at her 20 week ultrasound (supposed to be to find out the sex) that her baby had no kidneys and no bladder. They have told her there is no chance that the baby will live and she was basically waiting for it to die in-utero. She won’t do an abortion b/c we don’t believe in it. She has no amniotic fluid either. My sister has two girls from a previous relationship, ages 4 and 5. This would have been her husband’s first child. My family has never been through anything like this although I am a pediatric nurse. My sister is young (23 years old). May I ask you a couple of questions? Did you tell your older child about the baby in-utero having a fatal disease? How and what do you think they understand? Is it better to wait? We are so confused and totally at a loss as to which direction/advise to seek. If you don’t mind sharing, I’ll listen to whatever you think would help her. I also understand it you don’t.

    In His love,
    Wendy Whiddon

    • Beatrice:

      Hi. I’m so sorry I didn’t see this comment until now. For some reason it was put in the spam folder. I’m so sorry that your family is going through this. My heart hurts for all of you. When we found out that Oliver was going to die we told our kids that our baby was sick and was going to go to heaven after he was born. We wanted them to be prepared and know that he was not going to come home from the hospital with us. Oliver had a heart defect in addition to his potter’s syndrome…so we told them that his heart was sick and there was nothing we could do to make it better. When they came to the hospital to see him they all got to give him a stuffed animal that they later also put in his casket. They loved giving their stuffed animals to him and they loved to hold him. This is a great book that you could get the kids. http://www.amazon.com/Were-Gonna-Have-Angel-Instead/dp/0972424113

      If you have any other questions, feel free to ask!

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Our Family

Beatrice and Eric





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