"If you know someone who has lost a child or anybody who's important to them, and you're afraid to mention them because you think you might make them sad by reminding them that they died, they didn't forget they died. You're not reminding them. What you're reminding them of is that you remembered that they lived, and that's a great, great gift" - Elizabeth Edwards

"The deep hurt is the mirror image of the deep joy that still awaits you." - Bruce C. Hafen

Archive for October, 2007

Game Night!

Last night we were invited to have dinner with Megan and Daniel and another couple from our apartment complex. We had a fun night together. First we ate a delicious dinner and then we played Eric’s favorite game, “Killer Bunnies.” Nicolina sat in the bouncer and watched us while we ate and played. However, after a while she got tired and slept in the bouncer until the rest of the game was over. Daniel and Megan; Thanks for inviting us!

Nicci in the bouncer
All of us

Bowling with Nicolina!

Last night we went bowling with our friends Megan and Daniel.

Megan and Nicci
Daniel and Nicci

Nicolina slept during the first game but then she woke up. She seemed to like to sit and watch everything around her. There were so many different faces, things and sounds to look at and listen to. Her eyes looked as big as bowling balls. At the end she got a little bit tired. But we all had a great time!
Bea and NicciPicture of eric and nicci

A Fantastic Lunch!

Today Nicci and I went to campus to have lunch with some friends. It was a lot of fun. Nicolina was a little bit tired but had a fun time looking around and watching people in the Kimball building. Jillian and Sylvia also got to hold Nicolina. Later we also visited Eric for a short while. He was doing some homework and Nicolina decided that it was time to go to sleep.

Jillian and Nicci
Sylvia and Nicci

Happy Birthday LeAnne!

Today it is aunt LeAnne’s 8th birthday and Nicolina wants to say Happy Birthday!
Happy Birthday!

A nice walk

Today Nicolina and I took a nice, long walk up to the temple.

The Rexburg Temple

It was a little bit chilly outside so we put the nice, new cover to the car seat on to keep Nicolina warm. She looked like a cute little yellow teddy bear. She slept almost the whole walk.
Cute baby

Nicci all bundled up

When we came home we played a little bit before I started to make dinner. We had a lot of fun!

Happy Nicci

Nicolina’s Passport

Today Nicolina got her passport! She is so cute in the picture. Soon we will be off to Sweden!

Nicolina is proud

Nicolina’s Birth

When I was five days past my due date I just wanted to die. Every day felt like

a year and I was crying a lot. Eric tried to comfort me telling me that she would soon be

here. I was mad when the doctors started talking about an induction because I wanted her to

come when she was ready. But in another way I wanted to see her so bad and I was so tired

of being pregnant so an induction sounded ok in some ways.

Big and pregnant!

The Doctors gave me a time for induction on Wednesday August 8th. That would have been

exactly one week past my due date. I put the notice up on the fridge and was hoping I

didn’t have to use it. Luckily we didn’t. I hadn’t been feeling any Braxton Hicks

contractions at all so I had no idea how it would feel or when labor was going to start.

Some days my lower belly would start to hurt but it usually went away after just a short


On August 5th I went to church and told everyone that, “Yeah, I’m four days past my due

date and I’m going to be pregnant forever.” What I didn’t know then, was that I was already

leaking amniotic fluid and had been doing that for a day or so. Whoops.

Early on Monday morning, say around 2 am my contractions started. First they were

really mild and I wasn’t sure if it was the right thing or not. After awhile they started

to hurt more and I couldn’t lie down anymore. I went up to drink a glass of water. Eric

woke up and I told him about it. All of a sudden he looked wide awake and he told me he

could start to time the contractions for me. How nice. In the beginning they were kind of

irregular. The doctors had told us to come in when the contractions had been between 3-5

min for over an hour. After a while they started to be more regular and it hurt! Eric asked

me a few times if I wanted to go to the hospital. I was scared to go there and be sent home

so I was like, Eeh, no I want to stay home a little bit longer.” (In pain). Eric still got

up and made himself ready. He couldn’t sleep the poor guy!

At 6 am I decided that I had had enough and we grabbed the car seat and the

hospital bag and went to the hospital. When we arrived I was scared because it felt like

my contractions had stopped. They were more irregular now. I was so scared to be sent home.

A nurse directed us to the Family Maternity Center on the second floor. When we came up

there they showed us a room and started to ask me questions while they were monitoring the

contractions and the baby’s heartbeat. They gave me a nice (uh not) hospital gown and the

nurse left us for a while. Eric and I were really excited.

Madison Memorial Hospital

When the nurse came back she told me that I had regular contractions, and that I

was open 3 cm. The contractions however, weren’t really strong right then. They still

decided to let me stay. Yay! She asked me if I had any questions and I told her that for a

few days I had felt like I was leaking something, it was very watery but I wasn’t sure if

it was amniotic fluid or just something else. I really didn’t think it was amniotic fluid,

I thought it was just one of those late pregnancy symptoms. She said she would check and

after a while she looked up at me and said, “You are sure leaking amniotic fluid!”, “Why

didn’t you come in earlier?” Whoops. I could tell she thought it was serious. I felt really

dumb because one day earlier I was going to call about it but decided not to. “It was

probably a false alarm,” I thought. When she left to get the doctor I was like, “Eric, how

could I??, What if the baby isn’t alright and wada wada.” I went on and on and was SO

worried.” The Doc came in and he also asked, “Why didn’t you come in earlier.” I just

wanted to die. He did tell me though that it was just a tiny little hole and that’s why I

hadn’t felt it as a gush as it usually is when the water breaks.

They gave us a birthing room and broke my water. They asked me if I wanted to have

an epidural and I told them I wanted to try to do it by myself. Yeah right. When I was 4 cm

open I was in such pain. I was holding on to the bed and held my breath every time a

contraction came. Hehe, not really what they taught me in the Child birth class. I was glad

though that my body did it by itself and I didn’t need pitocin. It got worse and next time

the nurse came in I was like, “Pleeeease give me the epiduraaal.” She smiled at me and

said she would call the anesthesiologist. He took forever to come. I thought I was going to

die. Eric was a good comfort though.

Im having some bad contractions!

When he finally came at around 11.15 am I couldn’t talk at all. He was really nice

explaining everything he did to me. He told me it would take 15 min for it to work. Those

were the longest 15 min ever. But when it started to work it was SO nice. I could breathe

again! yay! The epidural was so nice. I wasn’t in any pain at all. I think Eric was happy

too because he didn’t have to listen to me whine and make a fuss. It made him feel sad.

The epidural slowed things down and I was to spend the whole day in that bed. But

it was totally fine, because I felt no pain! For a few minutes it felt like it wore off on

one side but they just gave me some more and it was ok again. All the nurses were so nice.

I had this thing that I had to have the volume of Nicci’s heartbeat up really loud in the

room; it comforted me to hear it. But every time the nurse came in she would turn it down

telling me that they could monitor her from outside the door. Ha-ha. But when she left I

had Eric turn it up again.

At around 7 pm I was 10 cm open and it was time to push. Yay, I would soon have

Nicolina in my arms. A VERY nice lady came in and prepped the room. I was so excitedbut

nervous. However, it was going to be harder to get her out than we all thought. After half

and hour of pushing and with little success, (because she was so much bigger than they had

thought, the doc had guessed one week earlier that she would weigh around 7 lb at birth,

yeah right!) she went for the Doc. Nicolina was starting to get stressed and she needed to

come out.

The Doc came and they decided to try to use a vacuum to get her out. I was so tired

at this point so I didn’t care what they did. We also had a child nurse in the room because

they thought she might have an infection from the leaking amnio thing. They were going to

have to take her right away and monitor her breathing and give her oxygen.

Before he used the vacuum he did an episiotomy. I didn’t care about that either.

The funny thing is that the vacuum didn’t work. It just fell off. I didn’t see this, but

Eric told me afterwards that the Doc became very frantic so he stuck in his own hands and

pulled her out. Wow, our little girl really needed to come out. I just remember at one

point the face of the Doc and he looked really worried!!

Nicolina was born on August 6th at 7.57 pm. When Nicolina was out the nurse took

her from the Doc and took her away to the little crib where they gave her oxygen. I was

like, “Why isn’t she crying?” and I went on and on about it until they told me she was

fine. It was such a happy moment when I heard her cry for the first time. Then I knew she

would be ok. However, she had developed a fever and they started to monitor her temperature

too. They started laughing when the weighed her and said “Wow you are so small how could

you give birth to a 9 lb 12 oz baby!” Wow, was she really that big?? No wonder it was hard

to get her out! She measured 22 inches. A tall girl.

Nicolina a few minutes old

She was in the special care nursery for two days to get the fever down but then

we went home. Our girl was fine!! What an experience this was. So cool. I didn’t die ha-ha.

I can do this again!! Nine months of worry and pain was gone! Nicolina had entered the

world! Our precious daughter was born! What a miracle! What a joy! I’m a mommy!

First time I held her
Precious baby
Proud parents

Nicci’s Blog is Up!

Welcome to Nicolina’s page!

Here you are going to get to know our sweet angel a little bit better. You are going to be able to read about her life and adventures and watch funny video clips. I will also submit cute pictures for everyone to see.

Eric and I are so proud of our little daughter sent to us from heaven. She is so precious. She means everything to us. She puts a smile on our faces and makes life easier!

Nicolina and Mommy

Our Family

Beatrice and Eric





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